my story

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It all started...

On the first day of my work in an office of the Investment Management company in London's City. I remember thinking to myself: "Wow. Is it what I studied for? Is it what my life is going to be about from now on - going to the same office every single day doing a job that doesn't ignite any passion in me?"

Despite this nagging uncomfortable feeling in my stomach as these thoughts were going through my head, I stayed in this job for another 7 years. Mostly due to fear - that I don't have any talents that could earn me a living, fear of staying without resources, attachment to security and stability that the office job promised. Yet, each year I became more and more unhappy, more apathic and depressed. Life was predictable and secure, yet it lacked joy and depth and connection. I felt I am becoming some kind of a zombie stuck in a vicious circle of work, parties, home and all over again every single week.

All this time I was searching for what I could be doing - I did embroidery, fashion, jewellery making, kickboxing, bodywork, astrology, human design and so much more, trying to uncover those potential skills that will make me passionate again about what I do. I was jumping from one thing to the next, feeling passionate for a few months and then losing interest again. After 7 years of endless searching I got into performing arts - Trapeze, Corporeal Mime, Butoh. And decided to leave my office job to pursue this direction. This decision took me to Indian Himalayas to the School of Butoh and Beijing's Circus School.

When I left my secure office job I expected the long awaited freedom, happiness and joy. Yet, it was the opposite. My mind became overflown with doubts and thoughts and even more fears. It was a very interesting journey of a few years, during which I got pregnant and had my son. All of it was a necessary step, still it was not the final destination. After so many years trying to find that one thing that will make me tick I still didn't find it.

But one day a chance encounter with the magic woman revealed Tea to me. In truth, this woman was not that magical, she was a specialist focusing on helping people to discover not only their talents but what talents would make them jump out of bed each morning. She told me that if I was 18 and lived in Paris, she would straight away send me to be a perfumer, because my sense of smell and feeling is so powerful. But because I wasn't 18 and was living in London, then Tea was the perfect alternative. As soon as she said Tea - I felt a strong resonance in my heart. Something clicked. Pieces of puzzle came together. I knew that I found it. Or may be Tea found me? Who knows. But this was the start of my journey with Her. With Tea. Love that never seizes to go deeper. That after so many years continues to grow. Tea is my Love. I live Tea, I breathe her. She is such a big part of my life, ingrained in my flesh and my bones. 

She has everything I feel passionate about - senses, spirituality, history, connection and so much more. And I am here to share all of this with you though Her.